Five Steps to Keep Love Alive in your Marriage

"KEEPING LOVE ALIVE"

By Remi and Helen Alaka.

Download PDF

Song of Songs 8:7

“Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away.
If one were to give all the wealth of one’s house for love,it would be utterly scorned.”

We believe that most people get married because they are attracted to each other and genuinely want to spend time together. In the initial stages of marriage, couples cannot do without speaking to or seeing each other as often as time permits. The sight of each other brings joy and excitement, and phone conversations have the same effect. We have experienced this first-hand.

Purpose

The purpose of this document, Five Steps to Keeping Love Alive, is to provide practical guidance for married couples to maintain and nurture their love over time

5 Essential Steps for a Thriving Marriage

So, here are five steps that we have tried and tested over time, recommended to our
clients, and found to have a positive impact in keeping the love alive in their
marriages.

Friendship is Vital

The secret to a long-lasting partnership is friendship. As important as it is to have other qualities in a relationship for a healthy marriage, it is just as important to be each other’s best friends as well.  Play games and have fun with each other. Your favourite games and hobbies will help you bond and draw you closer as friends.

Communication

Keep talking and keep listening to each other. Good communication is key to a lasting relationship. Keep telling each other how you feel, what makes you tick and what worries you. Do allow each other the freedom to speak freely without questioning motives or suppressing feelings. Be open, honest, and vulnerable – these qualities will help you not to be fearful in your marriage. Be people of your word – trustworthy. Do not hide anything from each other.

Diligent Planning

There is time for everything you set your mind to do. Allocate time for joint activities. Spend at least 7 hours a week doing things together, such as cooking, cleaning, gardening, taking a walk in your local area or exploring museums.

Care for Your Marriage

Imagine a beautiful garden. If the owner neglects it, it soon becomes overgrown with weeds and creatures. Similarly, care for your marriage. Some examples to consider:

1. Plan Getaways: Save up and go away together. Arrange for childcare if you have children, so it is just the two of you. Use your birthdays and wedding anniversary as opportunities for getaways.

2. Create Memories: Make a list of things you both enjoy and plan to do them. Building memories is essential.

3. Scheduled Quality Time: Have date nights, afternoon tea, explore the city, visit memorable places, and consider having device-free days or nights. Social media can eat away the time you could spend together.

Be Spiritually Healthy

Pay particular attention to your spiritual state. Ensure you have daily Bible study that is meaningful (take note of how your Bible study can change you as a person) and pray together as a couple every day (morning or night), agree a convenient, and uninterrupted time for both of you.

DOWNLOAD PDF